Supporting your son or daughter may be the best way to express your love and concern
Parents can experience a wide range of emotions regarding their son or daughter’s service in the National Guard, from pride in their accomplishments to fear for their safety. It’s common to feel anxious, but supporting your son or daughter may be one of the best ways you can express your love and concern for their wellbeing. Below are some strategies to help you be the best parent you can be to your Service member.
1. Be prepared.
If your son or daughter is deploying, be sure to:
- Attend Yellow Ribbon Reintegration Events and learn about local support resources
- Get your son or daughter’s mailing address (be sure you have their unit name as well)
- Know their social security number in case you need to find them in an emergency through the American Red Cross
- Find out if they’ll have email access or phone access and whether you can expect to hear from them
- Find out from your son or daughter’s base command what modes of communication the unit will maintain during the deployment (i.e. newsletters, support groups, phone trees, etc.)
- If possible, ask them to describe their assignment so you can feel secure in the knowledge of what your son or daughter is experiencing
- Get to know your State/Territory Family Readiness Group
2. Stay in Touch.
Correspondence and other means of communication can help you as much as your son or daughter during their deployment.
- Send letters and care packages including:**
- Photographs
- Mementos and/or crafts created by their children
- Toiletries, snacks, or other comforting items from home
- Stories and anecdotes of special events and everyday activities
- Protective packing material for fragile items
**For information on restricted items, check the restrictions list at the US Postal Service
- Number your letters, as your son or daughter may receive them out of order due to their unit’s operational requirements
- Leave time for care packages to arrive
- Connect with your son or daughter through Facebook or Twitter
- Send emails and find out in advance when you can expect to receive replies
3. Find Support.
The Joint Services Support (JSS) System provides many ways to connect to support, including finding local support contacts through the Contacts and Resources and sharing with other family members. Other ways to find support include:
- Talking to your State/Territory Director of Psychological Health
- Connecting with other military families through your unit’s phone tree
- Establishing a support group of your family members, friends, and community members
- Joining the Joint Services Support system to receive communications from your state support personnel and connect to your local support providers.
4. Gently welcome your son or daughter home.
You’re allowed to be excited when your Service member returns from deployment – but it’s important to give your son or daughter sufficient space to reintegrate into their civilian life. Welcome them home by:
- Collaborating with your son or daughter’s spouse and children to prepare for their homecoming
- Allowing them to set their own schedule
- Being sensitive to their needs to talk or not talk about their deployment
- Noticing if there are signs of mental or emotional distress
- Being a good listener and responding to their need for support and encouragement